can you help me correct my essay?
Question by crazypuma123: can you help me correct my essay?
hi! this is my essay for City Year and i have at least 2 hours til the deadline. they wanted no more than 300 words and this is what they wanted me to write about. also can you tell me if its good.
‘Discuss the social issue that most concerns you and the action you would take to address it.’
One of the social issue’s that most concerns me is drug using. There are many teens who are being pressured into trying drugs and selling them. though, i havent tried them myself, alot of teens who tried drugs, later on end up in jail, rehab or dead. and thats one thing many parents don’t want. the action i would take on would make an organzition based on drugs, and try to teach kids or teens how drugs can affect you. i have not seen an organzation besides the Meth Project that are trying to inform people on how drugs can affect your body. the action i would take is make an organization and if i cant do that at least go online n inform many young people on why you shouldn’t feel pressured to take drugs. and at least give them a good reasonable reason on why they should just say no. i think it can change alot of peopls minds and at least save them from what could happen to them if they did.
Best answer:
Answer by Tommy
Capitalize at the beginning of each sentence and don’t begin one with and. 3rd line from the bottom it should be ‘people’. Don’t say a lot and say the word and not just n.
Answer by annie42
One of the social issues that most concern me is drug abuse. There are many teens who are being pressured into trying drugs and selling them. I haven’t tried them myself, but I know a lot of teens have ended up in jail, in rehab, or dead, and that’s one thing my parents don’t want. If I could, the action I would take would be to make an organization based on educating kids on what drugs are and how they affect you. I have not seen any organization since “The Meth Project” that tried to inform people about drug abuse. I would form an organization that would reach many young people, through the internet and other ways, to tell them that they should not feel pressured to use drugs, and to give them reasonable ways to say “no”. I think I can change a lot of people’s minds, and maybe even save them from what could happen if they did abuse drugs.
It is great!! i think it needs one more last line. Good luck.
Know better? Leave your own answer in the comments!
Best Drug Rehabilitation Staff: Maria – Analytical Specialist – Best Drug Rehabilitation utilizes a holistic, natural approach to recovery from addiction. We empower our clients to take control of their own lives without …